Its me again. Been a while since Ive been here to update. Heh, its the asian new years, and more bad luck to follow me. Happy new years to you asian friends, and to those that want to celebrate it. On January 16th, driving home from work, I hit some wet slippery spot on the road, and my car flipped four times. Paramedics found me an hour later, and cut me out with the Jaws of Life or whatever. Here I am now, saved by God, for what reasons I have been trying to find out, but I am thankful. My new is300, was a damn good car, and we had our very fun times during the almost two months I had it. I'll keep it in mind, to think about buying another similar car, after I grow up.
For now, I believe a 2-door accord or camry will do. Nothing excessive, nothing to ghetto and dangerous. I got out of the accident, with lacerations all over the left side of my head, and as well to my left leg. My left arm, banged up, bruised over. My neck and upper spine, extremely sore from being shaken like a ragged doll, forced to wear a neck brace until my appointment today to see if I may go back to work. My internals saved by the seatbelt, took a beating from the steering wheel,giving me bruised pancrease, lungs, and ribs. Glass from the window, windshield and moonroof broke, and decided to randomly impale themselves in my skin. Sideair bag deployed, but front airbags did not. I have opted to go heal the natural way, by not filling the prescription for some pretty big Lortabs (painkillers) and Ranitidine (Nausea) pills, and instead dieted on rice, fish, and veggies. I have also been drinking alot of juices and eating plenty of fruitto keep my body healthy. The car is completely gone naturally, and the insurance company has taken over a whole week to contact and give me my check, which makes it a crappy one. I will be forced to make some calls today and get it sent. Heh, it is crazy, how although injured, much worse could've happened. My friends thank for different reasons. Some believe it is just luck, others say its b/c I was only going 60, or b/c my car was well built and protected, or it was meant to happen, and last but not least, I was saved my the grace of God himself. I know many people have completely changed views on life, if they have suffered a near-death experience. Personally, I guess I am trying to find a way to improve my life the way I lived before. My goals before was just to work and school, so I may go out to be sucessful in life, to support my mom and dad, as well as a new family for myself, and to do so with very comfortable living conditions. I attend school full time, and work full time in a hospital an hour away. I have been working hard, as well as battling the regular problems of life, and bearing the pain that life gives. I wonder, for what reason was I saved with only the injuries I recieved, and for me to survive. Don't think that I am not thankful, because I am of course, very glad that I still have everything intact, and most of all, my friends and family did not have to be sad.
Keeping my head up, after the accident. I have missed two weeks of school, and two weeks of work. Without a car I have to depend on others to drive me, until the lazy insurance company can cough up a check, thus allowing me to pay of the rest of the is300, and to purchase a new car. Rental car places do not allow people under 21, instead of 18 like truck rentals, to drive their vehicles. Although it has occured to me, through experience, that driving big 8-10 wheelers are more dangerous and difficult than regular cars. Just yesterday, the apartment people, came to put a lock on my doorknob, making it impossible to come back inside if the front door was closed from the outside. It seems my trust in my friend, Mr. John Weeks, might have been to optimistic. They came to get the money, that I was told has been paid off. Mr. Weeks, if you are reading this, you currently owe them 1500. If things are good, then I may have to pay the 1500, and my rent, allowing me to leave from this hellhole in June. If bad, I will have to sign a new contract, and pay even more than 1500 total and forced to stay here until August. Mr. Weeks, once again, if you read this, if it comes down to me paying 1500, your debt to me shall be 2500, for your first check to me has bounced and caused many late fees to incur. I have had a bad luck run with roomates. First roomates were bad, and liked to get into my room and use my stuff. My cousin, who I loved and trusted, was not able to find a job while being my 2nd year roomate, forcing me to use up my school money to pay bills that I have frogotten, since I feel sorry for her. Moving out, I had thought it would be a great decision, trusting a friend, I paid bills and lent money again. I offered him 2 automatic hiring jobs, that would've paid well, and enough to be comfortable in college. But he did not even try for them in return, and now owes me a grand. So now my door is locked from the outside. Watching 2 movies, that were critically acclaimed in Japan. Wild Zero and Ichi the Killer, has brain f*cked me as some would say. Both movies, completely random in plot, completely twisted in events, and disturbing graphics in return, made me more depressed about life. I live still and within this weekend, which I wished to be able to go to austin, instead I might will have to spend it to buy a new car, catch up on two weeks of schoolwork, take care of insurance, get my VERY much missed internet back; its off for some reason, and discuss apartment matters and will probably end up blowing 1500 dollars that I had believed as a friend, was paid off. Things seem so bleak, and so dark for the future, even darker than before the accident. Makes me again, ponder those people who see a much brighter perspective on life after these type of experiences, how it is to me, it seems darker.....
But for those that know me, I am me, and I don't like to give up that easily, and am still battling it out to get sh*t in order. I will just have to wait till the next day I may see an angel, that makes my spirit soar, and me smile no matter what the circumstances may be. For those guys out there who are too "manly" to enjoy sensitive movies, you all are missing out. Just because one may feel sad after watching a drama, or happy because a fictional couple end up together, does not make on any less or more manly than before. I have cried at sad movies, and enjoyed seeing happy romantic endings, but I can assure, I kick no less ass, and enjoy fighting no less than before. I can still play sports and participate in any "manly" activity that I have before, with the same amount of enthusiasm, and will power just as before. Due to my mom's working, I have been able to be more comfortable to feel what I feel, and enjoy the sensitive side of things. It hurts to see my country in poverty, where people work hard for what a simple hamburger flipper here could get in an hour. It hurts when I hear of little children in pain, and treated wrongly. I love my niece, for she can make me easily cry if something was to happen to her, or easily make me laugh and smile as i chase her around the house, laughing and running away from me.I have alot of sympathy for this world. But so many things go wrong, and I anger as well. Anger at all the rapists and pedophiles, that get off w/o a death sentence. Anger at the government, working so hard to punish drug users, and to get fines that are owed to them, rather than after the drug makers themselves, and money owed to injured citizens. But it is life, and there are things to enjoy and things that makes life, well, life. A movie, that is in my !MUST SEE! list, for both guys and girls, is " My Sassy Girl ". A movie which I CANNOT STRESS how much one is missing from life, if he or she does not see it. I have seen it 4 times, and EVERY time, I enjoyed it fully and completely as I did the first. ALL those friends I have shared the movie with, have purchased their own dvd's or made cds of the movie, to share with other friends and aquantinces. It is a movie that will make one, feel happier, feel the need to go on with life despite problems, and to try harder as what one does. I like to watch it when I am most down, because it has not failed to raise my spirits yet. It gives me hope for the future, and I rate it a perfect 10. Flawless from beginning to end, it does an outstanding job at what it does. Crazy amounts of similar movies of the same genre, appeared after the success of this movie. It is Korean and if you dont speak it then buy it with subtitles, and everyone needs to find a copy and take a couple of hours to sit and enjoy the movie, I promise you will feel it is well spent. I have made plans to watch it again today, because I feel a need for a lift of spirits. I wish I had the time, as well as everyone, for me to go and sit down and talk with everyone for an hour or so, just to say how much I love, or cherish them as friend, family or more. But for those that I talk to, do know that you are something to me, and I will hold you the trust of a friend that I like to give to all good friends of mine, and I wish you good luck on whatever you want to aspire to, as long as it is not detrimental to innocent people. Family I love you with every bone in my body 100%, thank you for caring, and to come down to dallas to check on me, and of course, I offer you my life in return as always for the better for my family. And more, I wish I had time to tell and express how I feel to each individual who fit this catagory. I realize I do have some hate pent up inside, wanting, wishing to be able to do justice in this world, but with every single person that I wish would die, there are 2-3 more that I wish to live and be happy. And that is how I feel, regardless of what I say sometimes when I get frustrated. I wish for a way to show everyone, that I Will succeed in life, and wish to show everyone, that I am trying hard to make things work, and to live life normally, as well as to enjoy it. Some things you love, can be so difficult to pass up, because of the love you have for it. Like it would be practically impossible to give up the internet, or driving, or many other things which I have loved for so long. As for people, please do realize, due to my schedule I can't hang with everyone I wish to relax with, and that if I take time to see anyone outside of school and work, all I want is for them to know they have to mean the World to me, to be able to find the little amount of time I have to spend with them. All I can assure to those that look at me with hope, is that I am trying hard, and do not like to give up. For pretty muchall my life, since I started to work for my parents at 9, the battle for my life started. I hope to make everyone that knows me, proud, and for all those that look up at me, to continue to look up at me. I want to be a good example, of whatever I strive to be, and I will try to hurt as little people as I can on my journey to become whoever I will be. As for friends and family, I never want you to be hurt, and wish only good. As parting words:
Family: Full of love, and willing to give everything.
Friends : Let's kick some ass, and complete tasks set before.
Religious: I hope God has more good planned for me.
Those who are down: F*ck Life. It's here to kick our asses.Don't let up, and show we can take it, and enjoy life. Oh yeah, watch My Sassy Girl.
Hah, damn those 2 movies, so disturbing, it has made it hard for me to sleep, and is now 530 a.m. Typing this blurt or xanga without the internet on word. I suppose I should go try to do something productive. Hopefully I will figure out the apartment problem, fix the internet, and be able to work by the end of today. Wish me good luck, for now I still work hard to trudge across the sea of quicksand, and hopefully soon 2 find ground to walk and run freely again. Family + Friends. Take care of yourselves.
I am to blurt before work hits me again, looks like ill be covering for my whole weekend off. *shrugs*
, oh well, Ill look young when im old, keke.
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